BXProject

docchevron132 · Post by **docchevron132** » 12 Aug 2007

So, since the new Technical moderator who appears to have limited technical knowledge on BXClub is already wielding his big stick against anyone that either A: disagree's with him or B: says anything appropriate towards Tom and Jerry, then why dont we start doing some proper "how to" guide's on here?

You know the kinda thing, what to look for when buying a BX, common failure's, short cuts, useful tips etc....

I know this site is fairly small, and I like it that way really, it's a closer community.
But I'm sick to fucking death of the hallowed land that is BXC, or rather the reverence granted to the people that have far too much power over the masses.

We may be small, but our knowledge, and more importantly friendlyness, is vast.

And yes, I know where this is posted, I have nothing to hide from anyone, indeed there will be a major PMing session on the other side before I throw the towel in there.

mountainmanUK · Post by **mountainmanUK** » 12 Aug 2007

Forum Politics have always got me totally pissed off, and I generally tend to lower my profile, and my postings, if any particular Forum gets too "bolshy" (Unless it's ME that they're getting bolshy with, in which case I FIGHT!!!!)

I reckon that would be a GREAT idea Doc.

Not a particularly 'theoretical' description of a job, or how it works......more of a "First you take a big hammer to the hubnut, etc., etc" type of "walkthrough".

That way is FAR easier to follow for a lot of people, some of whom are not really comfortable wielding a socket set!!!

Keep it small....keep it friendly......keep it FUN!!!

docchevron132 · Post by **docchevron132** » 12 Aug 2007

That's what I had in mind mate.
A step by step guide to real world repair's, what bolts usually sieze, how to get round it, EXACTLEY what tools you need, and the best place to apply the hammer!

I also think from now on, with the exception of Kitch, Stuart Hedges and Tim Leech I shall no longer be offering to do anything for any member of BXClub.

Madcav · Post by **Madcav** » 12 Aug 2007

I think it would be a good idea and add value to this forum, especially with 'real world' experiences from the likes of yourself and Vanny (to name but two) in easy to understand terms.

docchevron132 · Post by **docchevron132** » 12 Aug 2007

I dont know shit mate.
Vanny can do the technical stuff, I'll just point out where the best place to apply a hammer is!

mountainmanUK · Post by **mountainmanUK** » 12 Aug 2007

Too true!!

There are a LOT of people who have some practical experience, which could be useful. Even if it's only someone who has found an easy way to do just one particular job....it can help others!
No need for any of the anal theoretical rants that are occasionally seen.

I'd much rather take advice from someone who has done the job a few times, got the grazed knuckles, and can do it on a car which is sitting by the side of a road in the pouring rain late at night! Anyone can follow a Haynes manual on a spotlessly clean engine on a bench in a nice warm workshop!!!

Maybe Vanny could set up a "practical Help" Section, with sublistings for different areas? (eg. Suspension, Engine, Electrickery)

My views on helping others are.....
1] Help is needed
2] I AM able to offer some help
3] My help might be useful

I will offer advice / help in those conditions to ANYONE who asks.
(Although I can well understand your point concerning certain people in another place! Some people DO seem to think that they, and they alone, are qualified to offer sensible advice! If someone is stuck....they will take help from wherever it is offered!!)

Post by **Vanny** » 12 Aug 2007

well first things first then, the 'dont do stupid things' lecture explaining what happens if you get under an unsupported Hydraulic citroen, what happens if you twat your hand with a big hammer, and other things that uneducated people might not know about, and we'll stick it all in one serious posting, to which Billy can add his whit, i'll ad some sence, and doc can state the correct hammer to use!

And once its done (it should be a laugh) then anyone stupid enough to stop there car on a hill and release the hand brake into an ambulance, should probably not be allowed to breed.

I think the title of the this should be 'removing yourself from the gene pool' and people will be encouraged to read it first!

will start a new topic!

docchevron132 · Post by **docchevron132** » 12 Aug 2007

mountainmanUK wrote: Anyone can follow a Haynes manual on a spotlessly clean engine on a bench in a nice warm workshop!!!

Maybe Vanny could set up a "practical Help" Section, with sublistings for different areas? (eg. Suspension, Engine, Electrickery)

Ah, the Haynes manual, well, yeah, except when they are wrong! Which is surprisingly often!

Thats a great idea, Kitch has the same sort of thing on Overbore, but since this is a one make forum then it will be more precise and easier to follow.
That said I think Vanny isn't against other CitroÃƒÂ«n's being on here, so we could expound knowledge on other types.
I've done lots on every Cit, from Tractions to C5's and everything inbetween.

Although if anyone disagree's with me, I'll kill you, since you are clearly an infidel, I know everything and my ego is fragile, and I'm a worthless poof who loves teh cock, my word is gospel, did I mention I know everything?, AND AND I SAY, I shant be bothered to give any more help if any of lesser beings so much as dare to question my authority! Scumspawn!!!

docchevron132 · Post by **docchevron132** » 12 Aug 2007

Vanny wrote:'removing yourself from the gene pool' and people will be encouraged to read it first!

I think certain members of BXC did this a long time ago!

Post by **Vanny** » 12 Aug 2007

go have a look at the starter, i think you'll find this will be a real world topic not some you must to this and this bollocks! Humour, yes, sensitivity, get fucked!

docchevron132 · Post by **docchevron132** » 12 Aug 2007

Very well written young 'un!

I'll add my tuppence to it later, I've got to shoot off to Dorset!

stu · Post by **stu** » 12 Aug 2007

Sounds good to me.

I am a mechanical dunce... I can do things like change wheels, spark-plugs, air filters, fuel lines etc and have occasionally got stuck into bigger jobs with a team of friends who know what they're doing.

I'd love to learn more but I think I've reached the end of what I can learn by reading stuff and now I need someone to *show* me things and hold my hand through the difficult bits. Our geographical situation makes this a bit difficult...

...so a real idiots guide, with words of no more than two syllables, would be nice.

docchevron132 · Post by **docchevron132** » 14 Aug 2007

I'm going to knock up some basic service guide's for Diesel and petrol engines, general car servicing, then onto more involved stuff like canbelts, clutches etc. But it's late, and I cant be arsed right now, Sometime before the weekend!
Apolagies if it reads like "teaching granny to suck eggs", but live with it.

stu · Post by **stu** » 14 Aug 2007

Apolagies if it reads like "teaching granny to suck eggs", but live with it.

That's what some of us need Doc! I do very very basic servicing but I'd love to learn more. Small words and detailed descriptions are all to the good, and not at all patronising.

mountainmanUK · Post by **mountainmanUK** » 14 Aug 2007

Apolagies if it reads like "teaching granny to suck eggs", but live with it.

Granny sometimes knows how to suck hens eggs, but is completely bolloxed when it comes to sucking an ostrich egg!

"Doc's Idiots Guide to the Citroen BX" could become a best-seller!!!
It would definitely make better reading than Haynes!

docchevron132 · Post by **docchevron132** » 14 Aug 2007

I can assure everyone that NO Haynes manual was opened or abused in the making of these articles!!

mickey taker · Post by **mickey taker** » 25 Aug 2007

docchevron1472 wrote:Apolagies if it reads like "teaching granny to suck eggs", but live with it.

I need all the help I can get ,
you and Vanny have already saved my arse more than once ,.

I'm never too proud to accept help and guidance but how to guides will save me on phone calls and pm's lol

Having said that I will be p.m ing you Doc in the next couple of days regarding something I have just thought of involving

a car , beer , getting dirty , beer , a car show , beer and kipping on a floor not a tent and , oh yeah , beer

intrigued now arent you

docchevron132 · Post by **docchevron132** » 26 Aug 2007

I read the car / beer / beer / beer bit with interest mate, the rest got lost in translation!

I'm sure I've mentioned this before....